Have you ever wanted something so bad you would do anything to get it? I have, but I didn't do anything to get it and I lost it. And it hurts. A lot.
I don't ask for a lot, but when I do, that means I really want it. So, when I don't get it, I get rather upset. Why am I telling you this? Because this blog is real. Because I'm real. Because it happens to the best of us. Everyone always says things happen for a reason. Sometimes that reason isn't very clear at the moment, but trust me... this saying is SO true. You may not know the reason for a long time either. Take for example me not moving to Maine when the opportunity was presented a couple of years ago. Sure, I could have gone, and gotten a job as an assistant manager at a major retail chain and pretended to be happy, but thats the thing... you can only pretend for so long until it gets old. So, I turned down that opportunity; after a lot of research, a couple of pros/cons lists, tears and heart to heart conversations. So, have I found my reason for really turning it down yet? No, but thats okay. I can honestly say I am happy where I am right now. I can't say that I wouldn't have been happy in Maine, but do you want to be a single 20-something female living in a town where the half of the population is 45 and older?... and if memory serves correctly, more caribou than people?!? Um, no thank you. :)
So, here I am today, working tech support (My degree is in Information Technology - Network Specialist) and loving it. 8 years ago (when I graduated high school), did I see myself here? No, I didn't. I didn't see myself working with computers at all. Heck, I don't think I knew in my first 2 years of college that I wanted to work with computers. I switch majors 5 or 6 times before I settled on one. What I'm trying to say is its okay to not know what you want to do with your life. Sure, you want something now, and you are happy doing what you are doing, but are you going to be happy in 5 years? How about 10? 20? Can I say I'm going to be happy with my career choice in that many years? No, but right now I want it and I'm getting it. Don't stress yourself out about it. If you want it, go for it.
Another thought... did I see myself still single at this stage of the game? No, I didn't. But school happened, then life happened and I just haven't found the one to be a part of that right now. Do I want to be in a relationship and married? Sure, don't all girls?!? But seriously, yes, I would like to find a guy who appreciates me for me, isn't scared off by my can do attitude and who gets it. I'm not going to settle just because however. I am going to find the correct person for me... because I don't think you marry until things get hard. You marry because you need someone to help you through the hard things. You marry because you found your best friend.
How you meet that person is up to you. Try going out on the town. Try the (gasp) online dating sites. I'm not ashamed to say that I've tried multiple things. I've gone out to the bars... but really, I'm over that. I've tried having friends hooking me up, but if that goes bad you risk the initial friendship. Heck, I've even tried dating friends, but that is why we are friends. Because we love each other platonically.
Well, I've rambled just about enough... but I leave you with a few words of my own and a few song lyrics until next time.
Don't be afraid to love
Don't be afraid to dream
Don't be afraid to live
But most importantly,
Don't be afraid to be happy.
~Here's to you long shots\You dark horse runners\Hairbrush singers, and dashboard drummers\Here's to you wild magnolias\Just waiting to bloom
There's a little bit of all that inside of me and you\Thank God even crazy dreams come true~
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